Saturday, October 18, 2014

I'm aware that this post will be very choppy and child-like, but take it as a life update.

Falling behind in college fucks you over more than falling behind in high school. I've been in a rut lately where my eating habits aren't as good, my motivation to go to class is dwindling and due to my deep set sadness, it reflects in how I perceive my relationship, so I've begun to overthink it all. 

I feel that I annoy Bradley because I'm starting to come off as clingy or deeply-invested. I'm afraid that he will think that I am moving on too quickly, so I'll end up scaring him off. At the same time I'm afraid that our conversations may become repetitive and vapid, but then again, I just want to enjoy this and have fun. I want to be best friends, that means being stupid about things. I don't know how to handle relationships...what is right and what is wrong. I'm very very scared. 

On that note, Bradley is coming down for Halloween weekend and we're seeing Cherry Glazerr and Dum Dum Girls, so that'll be a pretty radical date! We'll see how that weekend goes. I'm planning on taking him to Gravelly Point Park in Arlignton where my parents used to take me when I was younger to watch airplanes fly overhead. I'm very excited to hold and kiss him. 

Bethany broke up with Abby. I think Abby has a thing with Kyle.

My mother told me I'm too fat for a belly button piercing, so I'm taking laxatives again and possibly dieting. Wish me the best.

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